Inexplicable items found in the office refrigerator

Item: A single bell pepper

Item: Full jar of garlic-dill pickle spears, prominently labeled with co-worker's name in metallic pen (three spears later unrepentantly consumed by author)

Item: Two pound bag of very tiny limes (contents of fridge scoured for presence of something that would necessitate limes, i.e., gin, vodka, or similar to no avail.)

Item: 214 packets of Hellman's mayonnaise

Item: 5 bottles of pancake syrup

Item: Ziplock bag of diced tomatoes

Item: Two bunches of celery (per their sharpie scribbled initials, celery and tomatoes did not belong to the same co-worker, eliminating author's original theories of "salad making")

Item: One and one half juice bottles stripped of their original labels (and minus any other identifying marks), containing something "brown"

Item: One unopened jar cocktail olives (Author scours fridge for possible cocktails...Turns up nothing. Checks to see if olives are pimento stuffed. They aren't. Author eats entire damn bottle anyway.)